Willpower

If I were a poet, and didn't know it, I'd be writing something like this:

The 23rd Channel

The TV is my shepherd, I shall not want. It makes me lie down on the sofa. It leads me away from the Scriptures. It damages my soul. It leads me in the path of sex and violence for the sponsor's sake. Yea, though I walk in the shadow of my Christian responsibilities, there will be no interruption, for the TV is with me. Its cable and remote control, they comfort me. It prepares a commercial before me in the presence of my worldliness. It anoints my head with humanism, my coveting runneth over. Surely laziness and ignorance shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in my house watching TV forever, Amen.

Thank you, my wife, for typing this. May it do someone some good. (Including me. The wife adds.)